Not Fake News

Saïdeh Pakravan's The Counter Argument

In the zany atmosphere created by #dangerousbuffoon so improbably making it to the White House (though not for long, it seems at this point,) a slew of hilarious news like none other keep surfacing. So, several times a day, I find myself with tears streaming down my face, not only because of the attacks on democracy, on the environment, on ObamaCare, on dedicated and brave civil servants, on the humble and disenfranchised, but from sheer, helpless mirth.

Raucous Town Hall McClintock

Here is a sampling of what I’ve read since day before day before yesterday, howling with laughter. I’m adding chapter and verse to show that these are neither fake news nor come from some alternative reality but actually happened and were reported on.

  • A naked moron–my guess, a disgruntled Trump supporter angered by the media reports on his guy–stormed into NBC HQ in Washington DC. And bit the people trying to stop…

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Fake (Alternative Facts) News

definition

“Alternative facts” accepted as term in the Oxford English Dictionary.

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And here’s the news that’s just weird.

President Trump’s Hiring Freeze Will Cost Taxpayers and Hurt Americans, AFGE Says.

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Revenge of the bureaucrats: Federal workers fume over Trump’s vows to freeze hiring and shrink the government.

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Newt Gingrich wants to fire federal employees who voted for Clinton.

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EU Considers If Future Robots Have Legal Rights.

Should robots be civilly liable for damage they cause? EU may consider the idea.

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Fake legal blogs use ‘lawyer’ photos that match online photos of endontist, ‘lonelykelvin1’.

Lawyer is reprimanded for pretending to gag during prosecutor questioning of witness.

Inside the Clemency Lottery.

Trump’s Truth-Telling About ‘American Carnage’.

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Resisting arrest should not be labeled a hate crime.

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Nearly 8 Decades Later, an Apology for a Lynching in Georgia.

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How a Kentucky Rape Case is Testing the Integrity of the Criminal Justice System.

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Big Data is Watching!

Consumer Advocates, 17 States Willing to Defend Consumer Financial Protection Bureau in Court if Trump Administration Won’t.

Should Microsoft Be Allowed To Tell Its Users When Government Searches Their Data?

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FDR won’t be the Nationals’ latest Racing President — in a wheelchair or otherwise.

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Amazon’s $23,698,655.93 book about flies.

Weird (Fake) Inauguration News and More

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Contrary to rumor, Donald Trump’s inauguration drew massive worldwide supporters.

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And now for news that’s real, but just really weird:

Can an American become a refugee? Yes, and some already have.

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Affordable Care Act repeal could increase rates, leave 18 million without coverage after first year.

Owner of recalled Samsung washer sues over inadequate, incomplete fix.

Networks have “incentive and ability” to disregard consumers.

Lawyer accused of using run-on sentences and ‘verbose exaggerations’ files unusual brief in response.

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FBI can hack your computer, court rules.

Victim of revenge porn sues to make the Internet forget her name.

Attorney-inventor sues EFF for ‘stupid patent’ blog post.

Parents Report Finding “Sophie The Giraffe” Toys Filled With Mold.

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Food allergy group files federal complaint over American Airlines’ peanut policy.

Student Loan Giant Navient Sued By CFPB & Two States Over Alleged Illegal Practices.

No, You Don’t Have a Reasonable Expectation of Privacy With Your PSN Account.

How Large Employer Health Plans Could Be Affected By Obamacare Overhaul.

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Man Loses Seven Teeth After E-Cigarette Explodes in His Face.

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Angry UberEats driver shoots BBs into Tampa pizza parlor, police say.

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What Trump’s Interior pick means for federal lands and national parks.

What is a Golden Shower? Your Kinda-Safe-For-Work Guide.

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New moth named in honor of Donald Trump.

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The Sunday Roundup for Jan. 15

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Neighborhood watch groups band together to develop clown attack warning signs.

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And here’s actual news that seems too weird to be real:

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Your new Stormtrooper Snuggie comes with a surprise: It strips you of your right to file a lawsuit.

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Some states denied “Hardest Hit” Funds to homeowners who needed it the most.

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Sorry, Wal-Mart. Amazon wants your food stamp customers as well.

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Drug industry hired dozens of officials from the DEA as the agency tried to curb opioid abuse.

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How a Prosecutor Decided That an Attack on a Disabled Black Kid Was Just Bullying.

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Thieves think they’re stealing gift delivery; make off with boxes of family heirlooms & Dad’s ashes instead.

Light Your Water On Fire from Gas Drilling, Fracking!